Answering Machine Madness
by Kurama-Hiei-08
Summary: Chapter 4 is up!: Well im not good at summaries, so this is the answering machine of the yyh gang
1. Hiei's Messages

Kurama-Hiei: Hey this is the nw account for Dark Kurama, just so ya know.  
  
This fic is co-written by XKitsuneX and myself.   
  
All the messages are from one of the characters to another so you will not  
  
know the person's reply until you here the other characters mail box, got it?  
  
Yes it is confusing, therfore i said it right! Pleaz enjoy!  
  
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Answering Machine Madness  
  
Chapter 1 Hiei's AnsweringMachine  
  
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Message voice: You have 30 messages:  
  
Message 1: Kuwabara: I  
  
Message 2: Am  
  
Message 3: Going  
  
Message 4: To  
  
Message 5: Kill  
  
Message 6: You  
  
Message 7: And  
  
Message 8: I  
  
Message 9: Know   
  
Message 10: Where  
  
Message 11: You  
  
Message 12: Live!!  
  
Message 13: Yusuke: You better not tell Hiei, Kuwabara. You know what   
  
he will do.... Wait... Is this Hiei? Oh crap....Nope nothings going on! What  
  
made you think that? ^^; hehe...  
  
Message 14: Koenma: Are you still mad about loosing your soul?  
  
Message 15: Koenma: ^^; I'm sorry Hiei, i didnt mean to bring it up. Lets just   
  
think of somthing else. So how are you?  
  
Message 16: Shizuru: Why is my brother calling you? Is there somthing going  
  
on between you two? If so please tell, then i'll have some dirt on my brother.  
  
Message 17: Shizuru: Well you dont have to get all crazy about it! Geez, you   
  
dont have to send all these messages about about! Now my brother is trying  
  
to take my cigarettes AGAIN! Dang you HIEI!!!  
  
Message 18: Kuwabara: What do you mean you know who i am?  
  
YOU LIE!!!!!  
  
Message 19: Kuwabara: HEY! HOW DID YOU GET MY PHONE NUMBER?!  
  
Message 20: Kuwabara: AH HA! So it was URAMESHI! HE is going to DIE too!  
  
Message 21: Koenma: Well sorry! I jus asked how YOU were! I didn't ask how  
  
Kuwabara is stalking you!   
  
Message 22: Kuwabara: HAHA You will never find out what I did!!!   
  
Message 23: Kurama: I think it is time for You and Kuwabara to stop this  
  
nonsense! First you fight about Kuwabara touching your sword?! What is   
  
with that!? Now Kuwabara is spreading rumors about you liking Botan! You  
  
better fix this Hiei before this gets any worse.  
  
Message 24: Kuwabara: :P You can't stop me Shrimpy! Everyone around town  
  
knows about it!  
  
Message 25: I don't care if you have a dragon! I'm Kuwabara and i have   
  
a SWORD!  
  
Message 26: Kuwabara:YOU BETTER NOT HURT EIKICHI OR I WILL CUT  
  
YOUR HAIR WITH MY SWORD!!  
  
Message 27: Kuwabara: I DONT CARE WHAT YOU DO TO MY HOUSE! JUST  
  
DONT TOUCH MY CAT!  
  
Message 28: Kurama: -_-; Hiei, i told you not to continue this! Now look where  
  
it got you! Now i want you to say sorry to Kuwabara and forget this ever  
  
happened.  
  
Message 29: . Oh im coming Hiei, just you wait.....  
  
Message 30: Shizuru: I cant believe im saying this, but   
  
I WILL HELP MY BROTHER TO GET BACK AT YOU!  
  
Message Voice: End of Messages  
  
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Kurama-Hiei: So what do you think? Pleaz R&R! 


	2. Kuwabara's Messages

SpiritFox: ^_^ Nope im sorry, i do not own Yu Yu hakusho but im sure these  
  
lawyers will find it for me! Won't you?  
  
1st lawyer: Go away! You will never own it!  
  
SpiritFox: -_-; it was worth a try.....  
  
Warnings: A little cussing from Hiei in this chapter so this one chapter  
  
might be rated pg-13 im not sure though, so just in case, just use pg-13.  
  
Thanks!  
  
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Chapter 2 Kuwabara's Answering Machine  
  
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Hello, im Kuwabara! I am not here at the moment so leave a message after  
  
the MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW! MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW!  
  
O.o WHAT?! I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU,EIKICHI!! -_-; meow......  
  
Message voice: You have 14 messages  
  
Message 1: Hiei: . Really? Do you ACCUTUALLY know where i live?  
  
Oh, i bet you had to write that down somewhere or do you have someone   
  
remember this stuff for you? ...beep.. O.o Why is your thing beeping?   
  
BEEP.....  
  
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Message 2: WHAT THE HECK!? THERE IS A TIME LIMIT FOR MESSAGES?!  
  
YOU HUMANS TRUELY ARE BAKAS! HAVING A TIME LIMIT! beep....  
  
O.O NOOOO, IM NOT DONE!!! BEEP...........  
  
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Message 3: Ok IM COMING OVER THERE AND DESTROYING THIS DAMN   
  
MACHINE AND IM TAKING YOUR STUPID CAT BECAUSE WHENEVER I  
  
CALL YOUR STUPID CAT IS ON THIS THING?! YOUR CAT IS CRAZY! IT  
  
IS TALKING ABOUT TAKING OVER THE WORLD! Beep....  
  
THAT ...BEEP.....  
  
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Message 4: IS MY JOB! DAMNIT! GET YOUR CAT TO SHUT UP THAT SONG  
  
IS VERY QUICKLY REPEATING ITSELF IN MY HEAD?! ARGH!!!!!!!! beep....  
  
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Message 5: Yusuke: ^^; Um, Kuwabara? Yeah i kinda let Hiei learn about  
  
"the plan" so yeah.....if he says anything, it wasn't me ok?....  
  
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Message 6: Yusuke: O.O'' I'M SORRY YOU WEREN"T SUPPOSED TO KNOW  
  
THAT! CRAP! I NEED TO STOP LISTENING TO KEIKO, IM STARTIN TO   
  
CARE ABOUT OTHER'S FEELINGS!! Just remember, i didnt say anything,  
  
got it?  
  
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Message 7: Kurama: Kuwabara, you need to stop calling Hiei. He is in time out  
  
right now so please stop calling him. Thanks.  
  
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Message 8: Kurama: Kuwabara! This is serious! You were the one who got him  
  
into this mess! After you tried to take his sword he saw someone that   
  
resembled you and knocked them out! Now please stop calling him and   
  
torturing him about it! How would you like it if i went around town telling   
  
everyone you were obsessed with your fluffy kitten.  
  
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Message 9: Kurama: Yes i know he tried to take Eikichi. but that doesn't mean  
  
you have an open invitation to make false rumors about Hiei! Just remember  
  
what I said before.  
  
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Message 10:Hiei: DO NOT LISTEN TO KURAMA! I AM NOT GROUNDED!  
  
I HAVE MY OWN LIFE TO LIVE! HE CANT STOP ME FROM CALLING YOU!  
  
MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
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Message 11: O.o What gave you that idea? Just because i live in a tree and I  
  
am now stuck in here until Kurama says i can get my sword back doesnt mean  
  
i'm going crazy! It just means that you are blaming YOUR problems on   
  
someone else!   
  
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Message 12: Keiko: Kuwabara, r you sure about this? Yusuke would never do  
  
that sort of thing! I mean, sure, He is always talking to Botan, but he would never   
  
go on a date with her! Not that she isn't a good friend and all.   
  
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Message 13: Keiko: Do you SWEAR this is the truth Kuwabara. . I'll take your  
  
word and HOW Yusuke is going to regret ever cheating on me.....  
  
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Message 14: Yusuke: WHAT THE HELL KUWABARA! I Am NOT GOING OUT WITH   
  
BOTAN! THAT IS IT I AM COMING OVER THERE RIGHT NOW!! YOU ARE GOING  
  
TO REGRET EVER MESSING WITH ME KUWABARA!!  
  
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Message Voice: End of messages  
  
*You can hear Yusuke and kuwabara fighting in the background*  
  
Eikichi: -_-; meow.....  
  
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SpiritFox: ^_~ You guys no what to do! Pleaz R&R! 


	3. Yusuke's Messages

Kurama-Hiei: O.O look at all the reviews!  
  
Kura: -_-;  
  
Kurama-Hiei: ^__^ Thanks you guys! With that, here is chapter 3!  
  
Disclaimer: -___-; My gosh, how many times must i say I DO NOT OWN   
  
ANYTHING except a plate of smores.......^_^ smores are good....especially  
  
when used with flames!  
  
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Chapter 3 Yusuke's Messages  
  
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Hey Yusuke here, sorry i cant come to the phone right now for i am   
  
probaby off chasing some demon around or . planning some type  
  
of idea to get back at Kuwabara....Anyways, you know what to do! Oh, and  
  
if this is Kuwabara, i didn't mean the stuff before, so just come meet me at the  
  
cafe this afternoon...We have some buisness to discuss.....  
  
message voice: You have messages  
  
Message 1: Kuwabara: O.o WHAT THE?! Why did you come to my house   
  
yesterday! Shizuru got me in trouble for ruff housing in MY HOUSE!   
  
. You are going to pay Yusuke.......This time I MEAN it.....  
  
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Message 2: Keiko: YUSUKE! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!! I THOUGHT  
  
YOU REALLY CARED, BUT NOOO YOU GO OFF WITH SOMEONE ELSE!!  
  
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Message 3:Kuwabara: :P HAHA, SEE my plan DID work! And you thought   
  
i wouldn't do anything! Well, I believe i proved you wrong!!!  
  
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Message 4: Kurama: Everyone keeps saying you are going out with Botan?!   
  
What about Keiko?!?!?  
  
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Message 5: Kuwabara: DONT U LAUGH AT ME!! YOU KNOW WHAT I AM CAPABLE OF!!  
  
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Message 6: Shizuru: ^_^ O YEAH!! FINALLY MY BROTHER GOT IN TROUBLE AND HE   
  
CAN'T USE THE PHONE FOR A WEEK!! THANKS A LOT YUSUKE!!  
  
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Message 7: Kuwabara: I AM TOO CAPABLE OF SOMTHING! COME OVER HERE   
  
AND I WILL PROVE IT!!!!!  
  
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Kuwabara: SO WHAT IF I CANT USE THE PHONE!!! THEY NEVER SAID I  
  
COULDN'T USE SOMEONE ELSES PHONE!!! :P SO HA URAMESHI!  
  
oh, yeah, and Keiko is really gettin mad....HAHAHAHAHAHA!   
  
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Message 9: Hiei: YUSUKE! U BAKA!! WHY DID U GET ME INTO THIS MESS!?!  
  
I AM NOT YOUR BABYSITTER! U CANT MAKE ME CLEAN UP AFTER YOUR MESSES  
  
ALL THE TIME!  
  
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Message 10: Hiei: GRR!!! U THINK GETTING KURAMA INVOLED WITH THIS WILL  
  
STOP ME?! U BETTER THINK AGAIN YUSUKE, CUZ U HAVE NO IDEA WHAT U HAVE  
  
GOTTIN YOURSELF INTO!!!  
  
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Message 11: Kuwabara: GIVE BACK EIKICHI!! Y DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO  
  
ME!! WHY!?!   
  
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Message 12: Kurama: ^_~ Alright Yusuke, i did what you said now u return Kuwabara's  
  
cat before i call off the deal.  
  
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Message 13: Hiei: ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! I'LL HELP! JUS PLEASE TELL KURAMA TO  
  
UNLOCK THE WINDOW AGAIN! ITS TOO DAMN COLD TO BE IN A TREE!!  
  
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Message 14: Kurama: No problem Yusuke! Glad I could help you out. But......  
  
you know Hiei is going to find out soon enough.....  
  
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Message 15: Hiei: . grrrr........ I know u are did somthin....I WILL FIND OUT WHAT!  
  
AND IT WILL BE SOON AND YOU CAN COUNT ON THAT!!!  
  
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Message 16: Kurama: ^^; YUSUKE! I TOLD U!!! Now he wont leave me alone till I  
  
tell him! PLEASE HELP ME!!! O.O .....o no.......AHHHHHHHHH!!! *laughter is herd  
  
through the phone* BWHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! ....................................  
  
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Message 17: Koenma:O.o Have you seen Kurama lately? I cant find him....hnn...  
  
Anyways...Botan has some things for you to do and if you see Kurama, have him come  
  
see me!   
  
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Message 18: Koenma: I DONT CARE IF YOU DONT WANT TO PLAY DELIVERY BOY!  
  
AT LEAST HIEI DIDNT GIVE ME THESE KIND OF TROUBLES!!  
  
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Message 19: Hiei: *tries to glare over phone* ....................................................  
  
.................................................................................................  
  
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Message 20: Hiei: *tries again to glare over phone* .............................................  
  
........................................................................................................................  
  
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Message 21: Hiei: . KUSO!! IT DIDNT WORK! . anyways......   
  
WHAT DID YOU DO TO KURAMA!! WHERE IS HE!?! I KNOW YOU KNOW THAT I KNOW  
  
THAT YOU KNOW THAT I KNOW THAT YOU HAVE HIM HIDIN SOMEWHERE!!!   
  
WHERE IS HE!?  
  
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Message 22: Hiei: WHERE!!!  
  
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Message 23: Hiei: IS!!!!  
  
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Message 24: Hiei: KURAMA!!!!!!!!?????!?!?!??!  
  
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~Owari~ till next chapter  
  
Kurama-Hiei: soo............what ya think? Good, bad or jus plain ugly? Pleaz review and tell  
  
so i can fix it and make it better! Arigato! 


	4. Kurama's Messages

Kurama-Hiei: Hey there and srry for the late update!! ;  
  
Hiei: . i c, so sitting on the couch watching DVD's when you should be  
  
writing is just a great excuse.  
  
Kurama-Hiei: - Yes it is!  
  
Hiei: -.-' You truly are hopeless..  
  
Kurama-Hiei: .........  
  
Warnings: yes, Hiei cussing AGAIN!  
  
This Chapter is Dedicated to XKitsuneX, so if u r readin this Thanks for the help!  
  
Chapter 4  
  
Kurama's Messages  
  
Kurama: Sorry i can't come to the phone right now I'm....uh...occupied at the  
  
moment and will return your calls as soon as i can. And P.S. Yusuke, O.o Why does everyone now know where my house is? A whole group of girls showd up at my house last night and my mom got a little freaked out....so we shall just have to talk about that later. So you all know what to do! Leave me a message after the beep!  
  
You have messages:  
  
Message 1: Yusuke: ; Sorry about gettin Hiei on your case, but why did you leave that message with the laughter and stuff? o.O Was it Kuwabaka? PLEASE TELL ME AND HURRY BECUASE HIEI THINKS I'VE HIDDIN YOU SOMEWHERE! O.O crap....I hear the door......Well, c ya then!  
  
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Message 2: Kuwabara: HIEI!!! WAIT TILL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!!!!  
  
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Message 3: Yusuke: HEY! Glad to see you r ok! O.o Where did you go?  
  
And thanks for telling me it was that baka-headed fool that used your phone!  
  
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Message 4: Kuwabara: HIEI!!! ANSWER THIS DAMN MACHINE NOW!! I  
  
KNOW YOU ARE THERE!! COME ON SHRIMP, ANSWER!!  
  
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Message 5: Kuwabara: . I KNOW YOU ARE THERE!!!  
  
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Message 6: Hiei: KURAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
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Message 7: Hiei: WHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
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Message 8: Hiei: ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
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Message 9: Hiei: YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
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Message 10: Hiei: COME ON KURAMA!! PLEASE ANSWER! ITS GETTING   
  
REALLY COLD AND LONELY HERE IN THS GOD DAMNED FREEZIN TREE!!!  
  
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Message 11: Hiei: KURAMA!!! WHERE WERE YOU!! O.o and WHY do you   
  
sound like you have a cold? Are you ill? IS THIS KUWABARA'S FAULT!!!???  
  
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Message 12: Yusuke: Just a question...but why do you sound all of a sudden  
  
like Jin trying to talk normal for once?  
  
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Message 13: Yusuke; O.O'' IM SORRY!! I DIDNT MEAN TO OFFEND JIN!! I   
  
WAS JUST ASKIN!!  
  
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Message 14: Hiei: Are you POSITIVE that Kuwabaka had nothing to do with   
  
this??  
  
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Message 15: Hiei: DO YOU SWEAR UPON KUWABARA'S BALD HEAD! THAT   
  
HE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!?!  
  
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Message 16: Hiei: FINE! SOON to be bald head! better?  
  
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Message 17: Kuwabara: ; Sorry Kurama! I thought this was Hiei's number  
  
because both your number are only off by one number!  
  
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Message 18: Hiei: KURAMA! WHY DIDNT YOU LET ME IN LAST NIGHT!! IT  
  
WAS HAILING!!   
  
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Message 19: Mystery Person(soon not 2 b one though..): So how is everything?  
  
Anyone figure it out yet?   
  
Kurama-Hiei: This one isn't finished yet, i'll have the second part up soon if  
  
I get at least 3 reviews! gets on one knee Is that a lot to ask for??  
  
Hiei: -.- ; please review before she disgraces me even more...  
  
Kurama-Hiei: Ya know what? Im so glad I can finally see your supportive attitude for once.  
  
Hiei: . baka 


End file.
